It has been 7 months since I was diagnosed with cancer.

Invasive Tubular Carcinoma.

I’m healthy.

I did not get chemotherapy or radiation or a lumpectomy.

I’m following the research of Dr Seyfried and Dr Winters, based on receives by the Nobel prize winner acquiring Doctor Otto Warburg who identified that cancer is a metabolic ailment rather than a genetic one.

And I am healthy.

My energy ranks are up.

I feel strong.

My hair even stopped turning gray , now stretching out thicker and in my natural penetrating night brown of when I was in my thirties.

My life has changed.

I eat differently.

I live differently.

I invest differently.

I exercise differently.

I’ve created brand-new habits.

Trying to sleep a solid 8 hours is still significant challenges for me.

And persistence.

Measuring my ketone and glucose elevations regularly.

Getting up and going to Taihe for my Traditional Chinese Medicine Treatment every Monday and every Friday.

The hardest though, of the past seven months, for me, is not having a doctor who stands next to me and tells me :” Do this, choice that, you’re on the right road .”

Instead of that there is the reality of no assurances.

No guarantee.

No certainty.

I don’t know without any disbelieve that I’m doing the right thing.

I believe I am.

Like when I fell in love with my husband and preferred him and said yes to sharing a lifetime.

And when we decided to homeschool and eventually unschool our kids.

I believed that was right and it was- but in those things there are always a backdoor, you can always send the kids back into the mainstream or file for divorce.

There is no backdoor, now , now.

T, my husband, tells me that, if it comes to it, I can go for the traditional Western Treatment, if we measure and consider the cancer is originate, instead of dying, then I can have the lumpectomy and imbibe the chemicals.

I think he is trying to help me be at ease with what I choice and pick every morning when I get up.

But there is no way backdoor here.

I chose and choose quality.

And there is no quality down that road, of that I am convinced.

So, yes, I too choose to live with not knowing.

In choosing to hope that Warburg and Seyfried and Winters might have an idea what they are talking about.

At the end of the month I’ll go for tests again. Doctor Tinger from Taiwan reluctantly facilitates me with that. A sonogram instead of a CAT-scan. And bloodwork. This time I’ll test pathogens as well.

It is sluggish work.

This thing of figuring out how been like living with cancer, instead of nuce-ing it and my form into oblivion.

It is a life’s work, however much life there is left for me.

And every morning when I wake up I am grateful for a brand-new day.

Grateful that at 47 I’m fit sufficient to razz my bicycle or accompany where I want to go.

Grateful that I am strong enough to play with little kids and pick them up and run around.

And laugh.

And enjoy.

And taste.

And experience.

It is a gift which we do not cherish , no matter how much we say it, to be alive and lives and be healthy.

Is it a antithesi, do you think?

To have cancer and yet be healthier and stronger than before?

In his notebook” The Untethered Soul” Michael Singer says :” Death is our Friend. Death reaches life treasured, because it realise life scarce .”

This is my gift and our gift of the last seven months: even deeper connect and little time wasted on silly pettiness.

In TCM and in the 10 Areas of which Doctor Nasha Winters speak, our psychological and spiritual well-being is described as very important.

Both Eastern and Alternative Western Medicine aware that we are not just a mas, but that our stomach is woven into our figure and alters our body.

At Harvard they did the longest study in happiness, a 75 time study, following the lives of almost 300 subjects. After 75 times they concluded that having deep, quality affairs does more for our health and wellbeing than anything else.

So I’m starting to develop a gratitude for the little piece of mutant demise that I am carrying closely connected to my heart.

We value, what is most valuable, even more.

Sometimes I feel this new world is a burden- but it is not.

It is a beautiful knack, describing me closer to myself, facilitating me determine life with better position and creating better health , not just for myself, but too for my family.

I still don’t know, like you don’t know either.

I don’t know’ how long I have’.

And so I live with hope.

And offset the most of every opportunity.

I’ll let you know what the results are at then point of March.

Until then- delight live.

Please love.

Be kind.

Forgive.

Love and forgive and be kind to yourself, as well.

And enjoy.

Enjoy your work and your people.

Relish it.

Z

I’m the girl in the blue dress.